My Recommended Reading List
Hello sexy people
I thought is was about time I put together my recommended reading list. These are books that I have read that have made a difference whether it be BDSM, Tantra, Shadow work, Consent or self development.
Urban Tantra Sacred Sex for the 21st Century by Barbara Carrellas
I am fortunate enough that Barbara is one of my teacher and this book covers a lot of what she covers in her Urban Tantra course. It has plenty of diagrams and tips for connecting to your sexual essence and some amazing breath work exercises. It goes into the fundamentals of modern day tantric practices focusing on pleasure with a partner and self pleasure. It is not about tantra itself more about the techniques I found this book really helpful with lots of tips and tools which I could adapt into my own practice.
Dark Side of the Light Chasers by Debbie Ford
I love this book its so well written and such an easy and enlightening read taking you into shadow work and in particular projections. A real eye opener put in such simple easy to understand terms and a must for anyone looking to develop themselves and connect to their conscious behaviours, revealing how the world is your mirror. Hidden inside this little gem could be the answers to the questions you have ben asking but never had the answers if you apply her learning. It also has some great exercises which are fun and challenging at the same time. Simpy outstanding and Debbie Fords work is something I will be following up on at later date.
Existential Kink Unmask your shadow and embrace your power by Dr. Carolyn Elliot
Another amazing work covering the dark aspects of ourselves and taking you in to shadow work as it gives a guide to embracing aspects of yourselves that are repressed and taboo. The book has lots of exercises for transformative magic and is packed full of challenging ideas. Looking at the idea that having is evidence of wanting and how to manifest what we really want and break old conditioning. A really enlightening read nfactt I would say a life changing read. Again Carolyn Elliot is someone who I will be following up on her work and course she offers at a later date.
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk
I really believe this is a book everyone should read, its a bit technical in places as it goes in to trauma response and neuro science. I found this book really helpful in bringing about a full understanding of what happens in the body on a visceral level during a BDSM session which really helped me broaden my sense of understanding and give me the ability to use BDSM as a form of embodied therapy. Taking into consideration that that fear and repressed trauma have a way of coming to light in some BDSM sessions.
Arousal by Dr Michael Bader
A thought provoking book which introduces new theory into sexual desire a must read for anyone who wants to have a greater understanding of their’s or others sexual desire taking you into the sexual psychology. Again I found this book really useful for being able to fully understand fetishes and kinks and also gave me the ability to work at a deeper more knowledgeable level and add more value to the sessions I offer.
Erotic Mind Unlocking the Inner Sources of Passion and Fulfilment by Jack Morin
This is an absolute must and goes in tot he psychology of desire, arousal and fulfilment. I question how I ever did this work prior to diving into Jack Morins master piece an absolutely brilliant book that really gave me the skills to see, play and build into sessions the tension and excitement. Introducing the paradoxical equation that attraction plus obstacles leads to excitement and how anxiety, fear and anger can intensity arousal. A mind blowing book which is intriguing and enlightening
Insanely Gifted Turn your Demons into Creative by Jamie Catto
Another enlightening read which covers shadow work with lots of exercises. Its refreshing and insightful and a must for anyone looking to discover the secrets of true intimacy. Taking of the masks and looking at what holds you back in a fun yet powerful way. It has a really powerful exercise for facing your inner critic and turning on your full body listening. This book has some great exercises for turning your unconscious conscious. Have fun with this book and also Jamie does lots of workshops and online workshops which I really recommend.
Thriving Sex Work Heartfelt advice for stating sane in the sex industry by Lola Davina
I really recommend that everyone in the sex industry reads this book it covers it all its really helps you understand the need for balance while being successful and keeping yourself safe. Covering topics such as loneliness, fatigue, anxiety and depression and avoiding trigger states it gives great advice for being a grounded sex worker. Written by a sex worker for sex workers, read it it will enhance your practices.
Dark Moon Rising The ordeal Path and Pagan BDSM by Raven Kaldera
I love this book written from a ritualistic approach and covering mythological dories and BDSM practices for transcendence through the ordeal path. Bringing spirituality and BDSM together in such a beautiful book with some really erotic images. Presenting BDSM as the gateway to primal passions and some ritual BDSM energy play. I love this book and carry it around with me or I did till my sub borrowed it. There is stunning piece in there about the heart centred rope work which is one of my favourite pieces I have ever read. For anyone wanting to explore the spiritual and energetic aspects of BDSM or gain an understanding of the power of the ordeal path, this is a great read.
Safe, Sane and Consensual Contemporary Perspectives on Sadomasochism Various Authors
A great book written by some of the worlds scholars on understanding the dynamics of sadomasochism exploring the meaning of S and M from a non pathological viewpoint which is so needed to gain a deeper understating of the subject. The book contains some research papers and goes into legal, clinical and historical perspectives of S and M. A great informative and knowledge building read for anyone who wants to deepen their understanding of S and M from an academic point of view.
The Art of Giving and Receiving by Dr Betty Martin
I often wonder how I ever did this work before I took Betty Matins like a pro course. It was a course that changed everything for me in the realms of consent, now she has her book out and this is a must read for anyone who is putting their hands on another persons body. Such important and valuable work in this book and full of exercises. It is written in a really easy to understand way and lays out the wheel of consent taking you into the quadrants of giving, receiving, taking and allowing, If there is one book that everyone should read to make intimate relations safe and consensual its this book a absolute must, I can not recommend it enough.
I hope you enjoy and get something from this list and let me know if you follow a recommendation also let me know your thoughts I am always happy to talk about any of the books and authors work on here.
Kristina J Huddersfield Escort