Part 2 of a series of writing by a ‘special friend’, the journey through kink
Getting dressed as Lisa started from my BDSM roots and was not because of any inner feeling that I wanted to be a female. I have met many people since who had that feeling they were in the wrong body and it has surprised me just how many there are and how big the social scene is.
Back to my experiences. Lisa could have stayed as a closet dresser but that is not in my nature as I have an obsessive personality and soon I wanted more from this new opening. The first time I ventured out as Lisa was a short walk to my Mistress’s house. In hindsight it was a small step in the scheme of things but at the time I felt very nervous, self conscious and the adrenaline was going overboard. After a few outings on my own I realised that if I was to make this convincing that I needed to stop being self conscious and act as though I was a woman. The more confident I became the easier it was to be accepted.
My sessions with Mistress continued and she encouraged me to go to other events. To do this I needed clothes and make-up. E-bay was a god send but I then became confident enough to shop on the high street. There were some exciting times when I was allowed as a male to try clothes on in shops although policies between branches varied with Anne Summers allowing in one outlet but not another. I became confident enough to make my first evening outing to a munch at a local pub.
People were in all sorts of different stages of dress/undress
This was no ordinary munch as the pub was closed to anyone not there for bdsm or appropriately dressed. I went as a male and changed in the gents toilets and was very nervous when I appeared in the pub. However I had nothing to fear and was immediately accepted into the group who were gathering there.
The night was unforgettable as I met a couple of gorgeous Mistresses who I became very attached to and had my eyes opened to the kind of group play that was around. People were in all sorts of different stages of dress/undress. Sex was allowed at theses sessions but I quickly found out that was not the reason to go. It was more the domination and submission that was the reason for meeting. That first night I ended up being held in position for my ass to be caned whenever anyone wanted to. As caning was my favourite this was like heaven and the markings totally covered both cheeks and lasted a week or two before healing. I wore these marks with pride and looked back on the photos with affection.
I felt very nervous, self conscious and the adrenaline was going overboard
One of the feelings I had when going out was fear. I cannot pin this down to one thing. I was afraid of being exposed and humiliated in public, being laughed at, being arrested for being in places restricted to females only and also being physically attacked by men or women who did not like what I was doing or represented. Fortunately none of these happened to me and I did my best to minimise any risk. My make up improved, I was confident when out and checked that I was allowed in various places. The threat of violence is always around but I tried not to frequent places that I thought might be dangerous.
One of the bigger thrills was going to the ladies toilets, mainly in motorway services. Act as though you belong and nothing was ever said to me although the first time was nerve racking to say the least. One things is for sure though you cannot go in the men’s loo when dressed as a female! Later in my life as Lisa I went to the female loo at Watford Gap services and when I came out a guy stopped me and I thought oh no here we go I am in trouble now. But no he just wanted to talk about how I dealt with the exposure and my feelings. He was also a TV but had not taken the step of going out. We had a drink and I passed on all my thoughts and told him to ring me if he wanted to talk more. He never did and I hope he plucked up the courage to go out as it is a most exhilarating feeling.
The sessions with my Mistress were now reaching an end as I had found the two new Mistresses who were younger and much more attractive - yes I was very shallow in that respect. One of the things that hastened the end was of my own making. I will describe that session in more detail next time as it is important to me that I get over the full details of the experience.
Written by a 'Special Friend'
Thank you Kristina J - Yorkshire Escort xx