Kristina-J Escort in Huddersfield Blog Posts

Opening the conversations

Posted April 06 2020

Let’s talk about sexual desires on of my favourite subjects….We all have them we are all sexual beings with naughty thoughts and imaginations, its healthy and it is allowed, yes I will say it against is allowed.

So many times I have heard peoples sexual desires be repressed and discouraged by family and society. Been into kink, BDSM and swingersI have been subject to this. I remember one hysterical night when at a civvy event with 3 fellow swingers and BDSM play mates meeting a lady who not knowing our sexual persuasion some how got onto the subject herself of swinging. Standing in front of four of us with our drinks in hands and giving each other a knowing eye as she proclaimed that all swingers were perverts, playing games like keys in the pot, dirty perverts said with much venom… She then when on to proclaim loudly and with much feeling that them that are into kink are even more perverted. You can imagine my face I was just winding her up and egging her one while my friends tried not to fall about laughing.. She went right off on it providing so much entertainment to yours truly. Maybe I should not have wound her up so much but I remember asking her if she had ever tried swinging or been to a swinging party. She looked at me and said no of course not then asked me if I was one of them perverts… I smiled sweetly shook my head and said ‘no, why do I look like one”. No she said.. My friends nearly spat their drinks out!!!

In another instance after watching a friend taking some friendly verbal abuse because it was alleged he was gay - even though he wasn’t I had had enough so decided to ask the person who was letting his mouth run off with him, in the middle of pub. This question, ‘So Jim you are giving my friend here abuse as you believe he is gay, lets just say if I was to put a strap on on would you let me fuck you in the arse?’ Jims answer was well that’s different of course I would let you fuck me in the arse.. Smiling sweetly with my innocent look I said great I will call round yours later with my strap on… Jim quickly drank his drink and left, who knows he may be still waiting for me to call round.

So coming back to a healthy attitude towards sexual desires.. We really need to talk openly and honestly to each other to understand our wants and needs. But it is not just about talking it is about listening with an open mind and a non judgemental attitude. When you are able to have open and honest two way conversations about sexual desires and preferences this can help improve your overall sexual satisfaction by teaching your partner how to take you to ecstasy instead of boredom. Being able to talk openly and honestly about your desires and leads to to better sex lives more satisfying sex lives and increased intimacy. It is such a crying shame that there are very few of us who have this in relationships as satisfied sex lives leads to happy people.

Also sexual desires can take the form of fantasy role play and this is ok in context of role-play in consenting adults. a large amount of adults have have entered into fantasy play in their heads while masturbating 90 percent of women an 98 percent of men, so here is the questions. If most of us fantasise while masturbating why don’t we talk about it. If we are able t talk openly and honesty about our fantasy thoughts with our partner than we will be able spice up our sex life, deepen intimacy and have fun…

Some of us are more practiced at talking about sexual fantasy and desires. I remember one flight sat with my friend talking about everything rom fantasy to BDSM and kink and a lot osex the poor guy next to us did not know what to do. It’s just a normal subject and the more we talk about it the easier it becomes. In my case and the case of many of my friends it comes too easy sometimes and we often notice our conversations been eavesdropped in bars or restaurants when we are out.

Some of us are more practiced at discussing sexual fantasies, but that should not stop anyone from being able to try (practice makes better!). Let the Approachable Pervert, (that’s me) help you along the way. It is my goal that we learn to discuss our fantasies without fear or judgment. By the way, did you know that sex with a stranger is number one on the list of women’s fantasies and group sex is rated very highly for all.

Maybe try saying something in the heat of the moment as a professional escort I am looking for the nuances the heat of the moment sayings to latch on to and explore maybe through role play or spoken fantasy language. Its fun and it makes things interesting…

In my play room I have toys out on show, not just for show but to open conversations around exploring sexual play which works for some that have challenges voicing their fantasies and desires..

Here are some suggestions on how to ope the conversation on your fantasies and desires:

My opening questions - what would you like to do with me and what can I do with you?...................

Here are some phrases you can use to help break the ice around talking about your fantasies:

  • OOO I would really like to try…...................
  • When you do…..... I love that it turns me on.
  • I have never tried…...... But if you are up to….. I would love to try with you?
  • If I do…...... That makes me cum
  • When I am having sex I love hearing, feeling, tasting…...............
  • One of my favourites - I am curious what happens when…..............
  • Have you ever tried?...........................

Possible Responses:

  • That sounds interesting I am not up for….. but I am up for….........
  • How do you think we could make that happen?
  • Yes lets give it a go that sounds lie fun….............
  • No I have tried that before and I am not sure….

Just be aware that when you receive a no it is ok don’t take it personally just acknowledge the no with a thank you and explore something else. If there is none thing I do like receiving when I make suggestions its a no because I feel confident the person I am with is able to maintain their boundaries and that gives me reassurance.

So happy exploring and remember curiosity is the door to extending our awareness of play..

Kisses Kristina J - Huddersfield Escort